Dave Barry
Thunderball
7 hours ago
"Like the fella says, in Italy for 30 years under the Borgias they had warfare, terror, murder, and bloodshed, but they produced Michelangelo, Leonardo da Vinci, and the Renaissance. In Switzerland they had brotherly love - they had 500 years of democracy and peace, and what did that produce? The cuckoo clock. " (The Third Man)
Bite not, lest you be also bitten. Neither drink of your own bath water, nor of the bath water of any kind; nor rub your feet on bread, even if it be in the package; nor rub yourself against cars, not against any building; nor eat sand.Click through for more.
Leave the cat alone, for what has the cat done, that you should so afflict it with tape? And hum not the humming in your nose as I read, nor stand between the light and the book. Indeed, you shall drive me to madness. Nor forget what I said about the tape.
CINCINNATI — Mike Thomas, 23, enjoys cultivating a close relationship with the Holy Spirit, but some friends say he’s become too familiar with the third person of the Trinity.Would you like a little catechesis with that whopping helping of casual presumption, sir?
When they call to ask what Mike is doing, he now tells them, "Me and HS are down at the coffee shop."
"It took me a while to figure out who ‘HS’ was, especially when I would get there and Mike was alone," says a friend.
Lately, Mike tells friends he’s "hanging with the Ghost."
"We all know the Holy Spirit is with us, but it’s hard for us to relate to him like Mike does," says one friend.
When the group heads out to dinner or a movie Mike sometimes pauses and says, "Hey guys, let’s not forget the Ghost."
When they meet new people, Mike introduces himself — and the Holy Spirit.
"It’s a little awkward when you’re meeting girls," says one friend. "They’re like, ‘Who else you got with you, Casper?’"
When Mike arrives at church for worship he has started announcing, "Woohoo! Another dose of the Ghost." He has even been heard to say during praise time, "You are the Ghostest with the mostest."
Mike also insists that people call the third person of the trinity "Holy Spirit" rather than "the Holy Spirit."
"Holy Spirit is a person, not a thing," he chides. "Do you want people to call you ‘The John Smith’?"
Friends say they appreciate Thomas’s close relationship with the Holy Spirit, even though it’s making their social lives challenging.
"We’re asking Holy Spirit to talk with him about it," they say.
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